Most couples have annual physicals, quarterly financial reviews, and performance check-ins at work. Their relationship — the most important thing in their lives — gets evaluated only when something breaks.
In Episode 36, Scott and Brittney introduce the Relationship State of the Union: a structured 90-day check-in that gives couples a dedicated, intentional space to assess where they are before small things become big ones. Not a conflict conversation. Not a complaint session. A proactive, relationship-tending practice backed by research — and one that most couples wish they'd started years earlier.
They walk through exactly how to set it up, the seven questions that make it work, how to listen in a way that actually changes things, and what to do with what comes up — including what to do when it gets emotional.
By the end of this episode you'll have everything you need to schedule your first one this week.
In this episode:
- Why most couples wait too long — and what the research says about proactive relationship check-ins
- How to set up the State of the Union so it doesn't feel like an ambush or an interrogation
- The ground rules that keep it productive rather than defensive
- All 7 check-in questions — with context for what each one is really asking
- The three-tier response system: celebrate it, act on it, or flag it
- What to do when the conversation gets emotional
- How to make it a ritual you both look forward to rather than a chore you dread
Remember — intimacy is not automatic... it's guided.
Couples Intimacy Resources
Looking to improve your sex life, strengthen your marriage, or deepen intimacy in your relationship?
Download Coelle, our guided audio intimacy app for couples, designed to strengthen communication, build confidence, and support emotional and physical connection.
For personalized support, Scott offers Sex & Intimacy Coaching focused on marriage, desire differences, and building stronger sexual confidence.
Explore both here:
Episode 36
